Friday, August 24, 2012

Oh Racial Misunderstandings, You are Hilarious!

So on a particular rainy and cold day, I was toiling away at my job at the Barnes & Noble. Shelving books like I normally do. On this chilly day, I had my hair down because it was a bit cold. My hair is what most people call, 'Injun' looking.

While wandering around, shelving books at a slow pace, trying to look busy, I wandered over to the LDS book section to put away the smash hit, Let it Go: A True Story of Tragedy and Forgiveness. In the section was a cute little Emma Smith-esque house wife and her cute as a button, blue eyed, blond haired youngling.

As I rounded the corner, this youngling immediately latched to E. Smith's knee. The little girl looked absolutely terrified. Now I am a pretty big guy, dress like a cholo, dark skinned, and do not smile a lot, especially at work. I tend to bring out feelings in white people that invoke the wild west, tomahawks, and scalping.


The Barnes & Noble dress code can be intimidating.

The youngling, who looked like I was going to steal her away and raise her among my tribe, clutched harder and uttered;

 "Mommy. It's a lamanite."

For all those who do not know. Laminates were usually the bad guys in the Book of Mormon. Emma Smith was shocked. Maybe it was because her spawn said it a loud in the presence of a actually descendant of Laman, who knows. Either way, she looked like she was about to cry.

It's okay ma'am, colored people don't have feelings.

"I am SO sorry!"

She than proceeded to apologize profusely. I still had, what my wife has dubbed 'Mexican Face,' on and this young Daughter of Christ probably thought I was going to go on the war party. I than laughed out loud, or as the kids call it, 'loling.' I told her it was okay and that happens to me all the time.

Emma laughed nervously, grabbed the closest book to her, and her and her child ran away.

I let out a sigh than went back to work. 

4 comments:

  1. I went to my local Barnes & Noble and not a single employee was dressed as your picture indicated. I was some what saddened.

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    1. That is because they introduced this new initiative called 'Manifest Destiny.'

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  2. I really enjoyed reading the three posts, though some expressions are not even in the dictionary. I will definitely recommend your blog to one of my classmates at Texas A&M, who's teaching in a small liberal arts college in NC. She is Latino and teaches inter-cultural comm. I'm sure she'll enjoy your stories, I mean, enjoy them critically.

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    1. Haha thanks Xi. I really appreciate it. I am glad you enjoyed what you read. If you ever need some clarification, just give me a shout.

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